Maybe it’s too soon to talk about this as people are still jumping on the “New Year, New You” train but am I the only one that is absolutely annoyed by other people trying to convince you to better yourself?
Everywhere you look you see people telling you to write out your daily goals and to schedule your whole day in 30 minute increments so you can get everything done and become this super efficient robot. Ok, maybe they’re not telling you to do that last one but they’re definitely thinking it.
Does our whole life have to revolve around progress? Around goals? When do you actually get to enjoy who you are and what you can do right now at this very moment? Is “doing, tracking, measuring” really the best way to reach that final stage of ultimate bliss? If so, then count me out.
Swiping through Instagram (maybe my daily goal should be to not do this?), I see so many people putting themselves down saying this will be the week where they finally accomplish all they want to do. By Friday, they’ll do better, they’ll be better, they’ll speak/write/read better. But when you look a little bit closer, a little bit longer (as I often do with a stranger’s profile on the Internet), you’ll see they already speak about 5 different language at a basic conversational level. I mean, isn’t that amazing??
In my mind, all I can think is that if you haven’t been writing down your daily goals already then, honey, I think that’s working for you!
If you’re anything like me, you’re a big vision type of person. When you think of what you want, you see it, feel it, smell it, sense it. It excites you and fills you with wonder knowing that this will actually happen someday. But breaking it down into a list of daily goals kinda bums you out. It loses its wonder. I’m not afraid of hard work nor am I going to deny that it’s absolutely necessary in order to reach your dreams. But I also know that dreams not only take work but they take time. A long time. It’s a slow journey and I’m going to enjoy my progress not track it obsessively to make sure I’m going forward. Because most likely, that won’t always be the direction I’m headed and that’s completely ok.
But how do I keep myself motivated or committed to what I actually want to do?
What works for me are gentle reminders with the least amount of pressure as possible attached to them. I have my weekly agenda spread out and on the side I write what I would like to do more of, what actions I want to implement into my life. They are sometimes vague (study French) and sometimes specific (Post 1 blog this week). I don’t put when or how or the duration on there. When I have free time, I know to look at my agenda, read through the list, pick out what feels right at the moment, and work on that. I put a check or at times a huge smiley face next to what I’ve done and can celebrate my journey. What I don’t do, I shrug it off. Moving on, no looking back, no regretting, no shaming.
"Ummm.... isn't that just that the same thing as writing goals?" You ask. Well, yes .... it is. But not really. What' s different is my perspective which in turn affects the outcomes. I will not be another person who whispers nothing but negative things to themselves about themselves, their lives, their habits.
I will be lazy when I want to be lazy and be productive when my body chooses to be.
I’m not in school. I don’t have 4 years to finish learning everything I need to learn about a subject. I have my whole life for that. There’s no need to be so strict on myself anymore. No need to always focus on areas of improvement. I want to see my strengths and successes as well. I want to have failures and experience the hardship of building myself back up.
I don’t have goals anymore. I have a vision that expands and contracts as life sees fit.